Saturday, October 30, 2010

Paranoia

Did you hear about the bomb packages sent from Yemen to US and England and India via UPS? UPS!!!Miserable, zealot terrorists!

Now we have to be paranoid of the mail. We have to be alert for any suspicious activity that used to be considered normal. Even the government wants average citizens to call in. I don't envy them sifting through the crazies to find the real threats.

Who is allowed to feel safe? Well, if we can assume their targets are major cities, maybe the suburbs are safe? For now. If you remember "War Games" I always agreed with that crazy scientist that I wanted to live away from major cities because if a war broke out, they'd be the first to go...Is Cincinnati a major city? Maybe we need to move West...Then there was an invention in another movie I like, "Total Recall," that had a mass walkthru x-ray machine - I like that better than the full body scan and the lines would move quicker! What's a little radiation, right?

It's a horrible shame what evil can do in the name of their "religion." We keep backpedaling to prevent what already happened then they find new ways to do more! So frustrating! They're like cockroaches - so hard to get rid of!

I say again - "Watch and Pray!"

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Super Mom

Hey all you super moms out there! We have many titles, maid, chauffer, cook, nurse, psychiatrist (ha ha), etc. I just added one to my list:

I'm a junior orthodontist! My youngest got spacers put in last week for braces and of course he fooled with them until one came out. I wasn't about to clear my schedule, miss another day of work and hike all the way back over there just to put that thing back in (especially since I was bringing him back in a few days for the braces)!

It even took me a few days to get around to calling them. She said if we could floss without a snag he was fine (he'd only worn it a few hours, so I knew that wasn't going to happen). After inspecting the little spacer and trying to put it back in myself with no luck, I realized it was just a tiny rubber band. I stuck a similar width rubber band between his teeth and cut it down - worked like a charm and no questions asked when we went in. Yeah me!

Keeping in touch

In today's society many folks have to move around for their jobs and lose touch with friends. At one point I was moving around so often I didn't want to leave my house or meet anyone because I knew I wouldn't be there for long.

Facebook was so great when it first came out. I looked up all my old friends. It was satisfying to see how people turned out and pictures of their kids. She looks great, I never would've thought she'd get divorced, I can't believe he survived cancer! he's the same age as me!

Then it got weird. Some people talked about their daily activities - I'm brushing my teeth now. Wow, I think I need a new toothbrush. - Hey, I think you missed a spot...Totally unnecessary. And I also had people trying to be friends with me that I had no clue who they were. That was a little creepy. My husband didn't like that.

So after I caught up with everyone I could remember, I quit. I sometimes think about going back to it. I'm trying to promote myself so when I get published (and I will!) people will buy my book(s). I give my card (for my blog) to people I know in hopes of more feedback. I'm hesitant to advertise too much for fear of the vultures and poachers that are out there to take advantage of my infant status. I'll let you know when I jump back in - for some reason I think people feel more comfortable commenting on facebook too.

I guess the people I know are like me - hesitant to put their info out there - or I'd have more fans. I know you're reading it, at least. Thanks! You can always become an anonymous fan =)

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

boys vs girls

I think my mom had it lucky only raising two sweet, helpful, obedient girls (right, Mom?)

I love my rambunctious, loud, teasing boys, but I can't stand their aim. I hate their bathroom. And they are starting to smell. And I hear it gets worse! Oh, my cute little babies, where have you gone? Come here and clean that toilet yourself!

But I must've been meant to just have boys because a girl wouldn't be able to take my mean mom side. It would have been nice to have an understanding woman later on though.

It takes both kinds...

Monday, October 25, 2010

Mickey D's

Please don't raise the price of the dollar menu!

Why is the government so concerned with what we eat?
I know, I know. The poor eat at McDonald's on a regular basis so they're getting fatter and have no insurance so the rates go up when they have to go to the ER from all the fatty food, right? (There are so many things wrong with that)

It could also be that there's too much technology gluing people's butts to their seats and they aren't getting enough exercise. Are they going to start taxing us if we don't measure up? I'd like to trim some executive fat, myself...

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Results - 10/19 Quick Prompt contest

I got an honorable mention for my 2nd Entry as "Best 'Hick' Voice"
Yeah, me!

The Land of the Mediocre

My youngest is playing flag football - it's so fun to watch. But it can be frustrating because it's supposed to be a learning experience. They have to let everyone play equal time, all the positions, etc.

That's ok. We've won a couple games and by wide margins. So wide that the league manager made a new rule that teams would forfeit their games if they win by too much (33 pts). So fine. We can hold back. There's no need to pummel anyone. I hate when coaches show no mercy.

Well, last week those darn kids kept scoring and we got just within the limit. The league manager (a spry 30 yrs old?) happened to be there and entered our huddle. He told our kids not to pull the flags. They looked at him like he was nuts. The silly boys pulled the flags anyway.

So this week, the guy sent out another new rule. If your team is up by 20 points, the other team gets to keep the ball until they score. And he added  "Solution=Let them score!!!" Now I think it's getting ridiculous.

These accommodations are really bugging me. I chatted with a grandpa from our team and he was more steamed about it than I was. He linked it to the future of our once great nation. Which is going down the toilet since we all have to hold hands and carry each other instead of letting the dead weight fall and letting the cream rise to the top! (IE - Why should they work if we're just going to give it to them!)

Making kids feel good about their mediocrity is not helping. They're taking the fight out of kids and turning them into a bunch of sissies. I have not sent my reply and don't know if I will. Unfortunately there are rerpercussions when people speak up against "the man." Plus I might hurt his wittle feelings. Here it is:


Is mediocre the goal for this league?
I am all for not running all over other teams and keeping a score spread limit, out of respect - no one likes to see another team get crushed. (I have older sons who have been on losing teams and it's tough, but they can take it - it's part of life!)
I'd like to know your objective in teaching the kids to "Let them score!!"
"Don't pull the flags, Johnny"      "Why not, Coach?"
"To be nice"                              "Are they going to pull our flags?"
"Yes"
How is this fair? Do you think the other team is going to feel better if we patronize them by letting them score? Why don't we just give them the 6 points? How far are you planning to go here?
And are you just making up rules as you go along? Everyone is not created equal no matter how you try to force them to be.
LET THEM PLAY!!!
football mom

"When everyone is super, no one will be." Syndrome (The Incredibles)

Saturday, October 23, 2010

BLFC #1

I just found a fun website that has a contest for writers to submit one sentence. Just a sentence about anything at all. Reading some of the previous winners, they get quite lengthy. The limit is 50-60 words. Talk about a run-on. Since the contest is continuous throughout the year, I decided I would enter once a month, because it's fun. Here is my first entry:

He swore that never again would he gaze upon that face, that gnarly, wretched, scrunched up, wicked, loathsome, vexing, car-crash-rubber-necking, pasty, pale, petrifying, mirror-breaking, hexifying face.

If I ever win anything, don't worry, I will pass it on.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Sickie

I'm sick today. Got a penicillin shot for strep throat that I caught from my darling son.

Before being diagnosed I went to work, I had an obligation, I made it through the day.

The best thing about the mom being sick - getting peace and quiet. The others have to fend for themselves. It's nice (besides the discomfort) to relax, catch up on reading and sleep, and not worry about chores for a day or so.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Meditation

I have to pass this on. It is mediation advice from a certain Buddhist, referred to as "the happiest man in the world." (taken from Prevention magazine, Sept 2010)

Start with 10 minutes and work up to 20 daily. (words in parentheses are my comments =)
1) find a balanced position - crosslegged on the floor or in a chair (before or after you make dinner, do homework, dishes, etc ?)
2) breathe calmly and naturally, concentrating on the air going in and out of your nostrils (nostrils, hee hee)
3) when you are aware of your breathing, (this is my favorite part) imagine an innocent, joyous young child approaching - in your mind, look at him with tenderness and feel unconditional benevolence and love (aahh ha ha haha! They are the reason I need to meditate!!!)
4) let yourself be absorbed by this love that wishes only for his well-being (this guy must not have children...that's why he's so happy!) and nourish the feeling for a few minutes (hurry before someone gets hurt or they come and jump on you or tattle on someone)
5) bask in the mindful awareness of love (hearts and flowers, etc)

My advice from the land of reality
1) make spouse or other responsible party watch kids for 10-20 min, shoot for at least once a week, daily would be impossible
2) lock yourself in a bathroom or closet
3) then take a bath or read or sit and do the yoga/meditating stuff, something you like to do

When you come out, you will be ready to love them again!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Where does it all go?

I can get confused by many things. TV is confusing to me. Ever think about it? Bits of information sent by wires, fiber optics or waves! to our tvs that unscramble them and put the pieces back together so we can watch. And all in the blink of an eye. Amazing.

And the internet. So much information available for us to view or add to. Where is it kept? And with so many people adding more and more info all the time - will it get full? Could the internet overload?

Things that make me go, Hmmm.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

2nd Entry

Same contest, take 2. This entry is diametrically opposed to the first entry. I think I like it better...

Two good ole boys crouched by the swamp under the crescent moon. The ribbitting revelry was raucous.

“Do you think we’ll see it?” asked Abe.

“Definitely. It’s that time o’ the month. You know, hormones. And there’s too many toads. It’s a re-gu-lar smorguss-board!” answered Jeb.

“Curse it all! I forgot my bi-noc-u-lars!”

“Shh! It’s comin!”

Out of a misty cloud came the soaring harpy. Diving fast, claws outstretched, aiming for a big, fat, juicy toad.

Snatch!

All that was left was a splat of blood.

“Whooeee! That was amazin! What’s it called agin?”

“A Krokolian Rage.”

“More like Croak-olee-an.”

Quick Prompt Contest Entry

Given 5 words: moon, hormones, claws, blood, curse, and bonus phrase: Krokolian Rage; an agent challenges her blog readers to come up with a 100 word or less story. Prize is a new vampire book (oh, yeah! sarcastic). But I'd take it! I just like getting the practice. Here was my entry.

The name Jayla Krokus triggers genus flora. But the peaceful image dies in the flash you spy her short, spiked, raven hair shooting up from a pale, moon pie face. You shiver coldness and death as she opens her vacant, black eyes to reveal the curse of a soulless creature apathetic to your pain. Her claws rip your flesh and she drinks your blood to fulfill her own survival instincts. Panting, her hormones finally subside as the Krokolian Rage is soothed. For now.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Needs Improvement

I think I've been a bad example this weekend. Overly critical, less patient, more bossy, etc.

I wish I could apologize to all those that I may have offended, but it's impossible (many were at the overcrowded amusement park we went to...hence my inability to control my attitude).

I will just have to work on handling stress better. And keeping my mouth shut - it doesn't always come out right...ah, well. It's a new week.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

It's great to be 7!

Happy Birthday to my little guy!

May he always keep his chin up.
May he laugh more than he cries.
I love to watch him when he plays
Because I know he always tries
his best.

Seven's a great age to be.
Innocent and wondrous and
fearless and full of energy.
And still willing to lend a hand
to me.

Don't baby me or coddle,
don't embarrass me.
But kiss me when I fall off
my bike and skin my knee.
I love you.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Outsourced

Cute show? A few years ago it could have been. Now is really bad timing. Who wants to watch a show that is glamorizing other countries doing our work for us? Not to mention the lead American guy is an idiot.

We need jobs, but no one wants to answer phones? Why not? Are we too proud? Or are companies too cheap? (that could be it!) Well, it's not ok!

I'd rather watch an Indian family dealing with daily life in America than a jab at how companies outsource work.

The whole situation is a joke.

Gossip Gone Wild!

Ever get a forwarded email from someone you know that's been forwarded several times...?
"Read this, it's so funny" or cute or whatever.

Unfortunately, some things that are sent around the internet are false or distorted information. I've been watching the news and many people are being misquoted and have to stand up for themselves on tv to tell everyone - "No, I didn't say that" or "That was taken out of context"

And I just watched O'Reilly talk about a far-left website that put a smear/boycott commercial on tv against Target. Apparently Target made a donation to a business friendly organization (not party oriented) who in turn gave monetary support to a conservative politician. So the liberals and gays heard what they wanted to hear and demonstrated at some Targets. For shame!

Too many people jump on a band wagon before they have all the facts - and there are devious minds who love to take advantage of them.

Please be careful! It's like thinking before you speak, but worse. Research before you send!
(And go to Target!)

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

The Lazy Housewife - prologue

I've been writing this book for 3 years...I've been too lazy to try to get it published yet. I'm working on research from the public (interviewing friends, like you!) Here is the prologue.



Do you ever feel like Cinderella? This could be the story Cinderella was based on…

The dog yelps for his breakfast at 6am – no need for that alarm clock. Better get up before he wakes the little princes. Let dog out, feed him. He is so happy – wish I had that energy but have to trudge back upstairs for shower or not.

Sweetly nudge princes #1 and #2 who grumble. Have to raise voice and sometimes threaten. Finally get them moving and take breakfast orders. Back downstairs to mister wiggle-butt happy-pants (that's the dog, not the husband). Make breakfasts, get boys on bus. Wake prince #3 who is usually more pleasant. Once he gets on the bus, then the fun begins.

The kitchen is always a disaster after the whirlwind of breakfast and packing lunches. Clean, wipe, rinse, repeat. Run the dishwasher. Pay some bills. Plan day. Is it grocery day? Target? Book fair? Class party? Or just a clean house day? Don’t forget to purge the kids’ clothes and toys for the donation coming up. And then there’s the laundry. Balance the checkbook. Make a dr’s appointment. Make sure something gets vacuumed or scrubbed. Not to mention taking the dog out in between chores. And all of a sudden it’s 3pm.

Kids get home. Have snack. Tease each other. Time out. They play, you start dinner. They complain. After dinner they either do homework and complain some more or go to practice. Come home, finish homework, showers, bed. WHEW!

9ish Cinderella gets to watch her recorded tv show before crashing. “What? Not go to the ball? What did you say?” (in high pitched, mousy voice)

My dream come true is “House” and my pillow.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Today was a Monday

I knew today was Monday because...

I got an assignment the night before and forgot to reset my alarm clock...that's bad
Then I woke up in middle of night and remembered...that's good
But in my half asleep state I set it to PM instead of AM and woke up late anyway...that's bad
Made it to school on time and had a decent day...that's good

Took 2 children to orthodontist consult appointment and younger one needs braces...that's fine
The other child does not...that's great!
Homework time was miserable for all...that's bad, but normal
Finally got boys to bed...that's good
But had to remake one bed from an accident...that's bad, come on!

Tomorrow is another day and we will learn from our mistakes on Monday...that's good!

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Grow up!

So I was ordering a cake at the bakery. There was a lady there that said her son's birthday was the same day as my son's birthday. What a coincidence. But hers is turning 25.

Then she said he wants a Wii. It sounded like he was still living with her. Maybe not.
But it made me wonder how many young adults still live with their parents. Especially with the new healthcare law forcing insurers to cover "kids" until they are 26. It just doesn't seem right.

I was hoping some of those fresh twenty-somethings could help come up with new ideas. Find solutions instead of being part of the problem. Believe me, I know how hard it is to get a job out there - I know too many people out of work. People who need to work to support their families. But living at home and sponging off parents? Sounds lazy to me. And sounds like the parents are letting them be. Are these the same parents that never forced their kids to do chores? That didn't really keep tabs on them when they got older?

Kids will get away with whatever we let them - as long as we let them. I know some very productive twenty-somethings. They are struggling being on their own, but they are doing it. We did it. At one time I worked 4 jobs to afford my apartment and car. I also didn't have health insurance because it was all part time. There weren't enough jobs then, either. There are even less now. There's lots of undesirable jobs available - like the jobs illegal immigrants do for us and jobs that are outsourced to other countries...lazy Americans!

I wonder how things will be when my kids get older. Maybe I'll be changing my tune. I hope there will be room for them in the workforce. Who's gonna take care of me when I'm old!

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Old is the new Young

Wouldn't that be nice? I really felt my age as I stood up and twisted just right to throw out my back. AAAH! My youth flashed before my eyes as I desperately tried to right myself. Ooch and  Ouch with every move. Uh, Oh, Eee! I slowly stood up and made it down the stairs. One step at a time. Wincing all the way. I got my son to his practice, who selflessly offered to stay home. I sat in the car and turned on the back-of-the-seat warmer. Finally I was able to take some ibuprofen. I'm much better now, but still very sore.

Calgon take me away!

(dating myself. do they even make calgon anymore?)

Train of thought

Ever start thinking about something and it makes you think of something else, and on and on until you forget where you started? "Why did I think of that?"

My problem is, I'll be in a conversation with a group and I'll hear something to trigger it. The topic will get on the train and when I finally say something it will be completely side tracked, drawing strange looks. Oops!

It's getting hot again. My friend called it Indian summer. Wonder why it's called Indian summer - is it like Indian giver? "Here's some cool fall weather, uh oh, now I'm taking it back!" But that phrase is offensive to Indians - Native Americans. And if they are now Native Americans why can't we use the term Indians? Does it bother people from India? My neighbor is from India, I could ask her. Her son is in my son's class. They've been in the same class like four times. There's a girl in his class that has been in his class since kindergarten - 6 years! Hard to believe since our schools seem to have so many kids, but I guess it's really small. It's a small world =) Is it hot in here?

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Cave Dwellers

There seems to be a trend in my neighborhood: more and more men are staying home - whether to work out of the house or because they are out of work. My street is probably disproportionate, but maybe not. 6 out of 15 have home offices and there's a few more around the corner.

At first I thought it would be great. He could help around the house, he wouldn't be grumpy from rush hour traffic. And I was able to go back to work because he helped with the kids. Then the drawbacks came out. "Everyone stop yelling! I'm getting on a conference call!" or I'd ask a quick question and he'd say, "Can't you see I'm working!" so I'd email him. And helping around the house - HA! It's worse because I swear he has no idea what a trash can is for and wouldn't be able to find one if he did.

So I enjoy when he has to go out of town once in a while. And all this change makes me think of the caveman days. Don't ask me why. Like when the men had to go off on long trips to hunt and the women stayed local and took care of everything else. You know the men were happy to get away from the women folk for a while. They would have a great time being stupid, "I bet I can hit that dinosaur right between the eyes."

And what do you think the women did all day? "Gotta skin that sabertooth, Momma needs a new rug, ugh," "Huu, stop hitting your brother Kuu with that stick," "Caa, draw your pictures on the wall or you go to bed with no dinner!" all with another papoose strapped to her back.

Same old, same old.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Am I worried over nothing?

I got to sub in American History today. We watched a video (go figure) about World War I. I was happy that I remembered most of it. But as I watched it unfold, with my adult perspective, I couldn't help but relate that time to what is happening in the Middle East. Is history repeating itself, again?

Wacko Extremist Muslims (not the good, peaceful Muslims) are ready to tear us up! They HATE us and our disgusting freedom! The leader of Iran blatantly cursed us in front of the whole world. He talks like he can do something about it. Like he dares us to try something so he can show us what they've got. He's scary! And he wonders why we don't want him to have nukes!

The terrorist leaders remind me of the Kaiser from WWI and Hitler from WWII. They want to rule the world. They think we would all be better off if we follow them. But these guys are adding a twist. They tell everyone they are attacking based on their religious beliefs. Same crazies, different era.

In WWI, the Germans introduced chemical warfare by using a poisonous gas. I am afraid of what could happen today with deadly viruses researched in our labs. (I watched a video about the Black Plague a couple of weeks ago - unbelievable! And we still have some of it bottled up somewhere!) We have been lucky up until now. If they got their hands on any of that stuff we'd be in real trouble.

The Germans showed they would go to any lengths with no regard for civilians versus military. Just like the terrorists. But the terrorists don't even value their own lives, sacrificing themselves with suicide bombings, for their greater good. Akin to the kamikazes of WWII. INSANE!

The internet is a great tool but is potentially dangerous with hackers and irresponsible, selfish, money grabbers. We've shown the world we couldn't do anything about the jerk that spread our "secrets" with his wikileaks. I still can't believe he got off scott free. Is nothing sacred?

The Germans were pompous, thinking they could win in 24 days. When they finally gave up, the annhiliation of the forests and cities in Europe was devastating. The men held stand offs, living in the trenches among the dead year after year. Millions died to gain scant miles of territory. Likewise there are so many dying right now. And for what? What is our objective? To stop terrorists? Are we supposed to shape Afghanistan into a democratic nation? Like that'll happen. I hope they know their goals because I don't.

I observed the kids watching the video. Most of them looked bored. Understandably - it was mostly in black and white and there were a lot of words they probably didn't understand. These kids, like most people, feel safe in their little worlds. They take for granted that they will go to school, eat three meals, watch tv and have a bed to sleep in.

I got an ominous feeling watching that video. I am afraid we are a weak nation right now. The world is struggling economically. We could be ripe for an assault. We need more flies on their walls. Something big is coming and I wonder and worry if it will be in my lifetime (or my kids!)

Watch and pray.

Welcome to the Club!

Happy Birthday to you!

Happy Birthday to you!

Happy Birthday, dear sister!

Happy Birthday to you!


My number one fan just turned 40!

Weren't we cute!

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Third Child Syndrome

Poor last child, the youngest, the smallest.
He gets dragged here and there, along for the ride
And sometimes gets left  behind. (not by me! yet!)

He wants to keep up with his older siblings
Doesn't like baby toys or young games.
Knows and thinks he knows way too much.

It's tough being the little guy sometimes.
He gets knocked down by the big kids
But he's not gonna let them see him cry.

When he's done growing he'll be the tallest.
He'll have his big sibs' experience and advice.
He's luckier than he realizes.

And he will always be my baby.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Thanks!

Give an unexpected "Thank you." To a grocery bagger or checkout person or your mail carrier or a garbage man. So many jobs are thankless and taken for granted. Showing strangers you appreciate them makes you both feel good!

Thanks for reading my blog! Pass it on.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

I'm a planner

Plan for the worst, hope for the best. You won't be disappointed.

Cooperisms 1

On the bus Cooper and his friend have an admirer. They're in 1st grade.
So to them it's
"TORTURE! TORTURE!" (pronounced, torchor)

Love it!

Friday, October 1, 2010

Itsy Bitsy Spider

Had a nice intro to October today.
While my boys and I chatted over breakfast, a little, fat, white spider decided to join us and landed right in the middle of the counter! And frightened my big boys away (screaming like girls). It was quite funny!

Happy October!