TITLE: The Air Maiden
GENRE: Adult Urban Fantasy
WORD COUNT: 80,000
QUERY:
Bree's quiet life on a remote ranch goes to hell in a handbasket of epic proportions thanks to a few pesky gods.
Three months after the death of her father, Bree is dragged out of her home, into a life filled with myth and not a few sword fights. She is one of nine females known only as The Maidens – legendary women predicted to save humanity. To top the heaping plateful of new reality, she is saddled with Alex, a friend of her father's, who joins her and is frustratingly full of secrets.
During their adventures up and down the Rockies, Bree discovers why gods want her dead and how to keep her head firmly attached. If she can accept her new life, and what she was bred to do, she might be able to show mere mortals how to kick ass and take names against those who want to enslave humans for power.
First 150 Words:
You know, life throws some pretty mean curve balls. What I thought life would be when young is nothing compared to the present. And I swear, sometimes my Daddy lied, I'm actually the daughter of Murphy and those bloody laws of his.
Life used to be uncomplicated. Daddy’s cooking was atrocious, but as soon as I was able, I cooked and he cleaned. Our days filled with predictability. Puberty had its challenges, but we made it. While a few incidents during my teen years hinted at my future, I easily ignored them. Hindsight is twenty-twenty right?
My life was good. Lonely, but good nonetheless. Then, in my twenty eighth year, life threw some curve balls, a massive fast ball and one huge foul ball I took a swing at.
Great work! The voice is very strong in your opening chapter. It might help your query shine to bring hints of that voice into the query itself.
ReplyDeleteI'll be voting later so check back and see if I leave another comment. :)
A ton of voice in your 150. I really like Bree. She seems spunky and fun. Sounds like a great read!
ReplyDeleteYour plot sounds like a whole lot of fun, but I'd watch out for cliches, there's at least four here. At the very least I'd avoid using the one in your opening hook; there's no quicker way to sound like "more of the same." Best luck!
ReplyDeleteI loved this concept, so original and fun sounding. I was thrown off by how much 'telling' was in the opening though. Still, it made my short list.
ReplyDelete