COMMERCIAL FICTION ROMANCE
110,000
QUERY:
When Anna took on the daunting task of restoring Matt to a state of sobriety, she never expected to fall in love; and she certainly wouldn’t have guessed the object of her desire would be Matt's father.
Before passing out and hitting the floor, Matt drunkenly declares his love for Anna. Knowing that Matt is tottering between depression and sanity, she wishes she could fix everything by telling him she loves him back, but she just can’t. So she decides to search for someone who can.
Perhaps the solution lies with Matt’s father, Tom. Despite the fact that everyone believes he is dead, after finding his old journal Anna has reason to believe otherwise. Embarking on a search through shark infested waters to a hellish island in the middle of nowhere, she discovers that the man she is looking for is indeed alive. A father’s love certainly isn’t the same as the love of a woman, but Anna hopes it will be enough to bring Matt back to himself.
However, a wrench is thrown into her plans when she finds herself falling for Tom. Now the man who is supposed to be Matt’s saviour could be the man who ends up bringing him more pain and heartbreak.
FIRST 150 WORDS:
"The truth of the matter is….. I think you’re amazing!” Matt stammered as he stood there
on uneasy legs, the effects of half a bottle of rum finally becoming visible.
"Did you hear me? I think you’re amazing and… I’m in love with you.” These last five
words were barely audible as he uttered them with a great sigh, just before passing out.
Matt was a tall man, nearly 6 foot 9, and like a big boulder being tossed from a rooftop
onto the pavement, he didn’t land quietly.
In any other circumstance Anna would have tried to cushion his fall by attempting to catch
him, but being completely shocked by Matt’s words, Anna had remained frozen to the
spot, unable to react. Still stunned, she just stood there with one hand gripping her slender
waist and the other hand twirling that stubborn piece of hair back behind her ear while
Matt’s words echoed in her head.
on uneasy legs, the effects of half a bottle of rum finally becoming visible.
"Did you hear me? I think you’re amazing and… I’m in love with you.” These last five
words were barely audible as he uttered them with a great sigh, just before passing out.
Matt was a tall man, nearly 6 foot 9, and like a big boulder being tossed from a rooftop
onto the pavement, he didn’t land quietly.
In any other circumstance Anna would have tried to cushion his fall by attempting to catch
him, but being completely shocked by Matt’s words, Anna had remained frozen to the
spot, unable to react. Still stunned, she just stood there with one hand gripping her slender
waist and the other hand twirling that stubborn piece of hair back behind her ear while
Matt’s words echoed in her head.
I like this premise. I got really interested when I read that she starts to fall for the dad! Very solid query and good opening. I'll be voting later so check back! :)
ReplyDeleteEven though I didn't win your vote, I greatly appreciate your feedback. You are so sweet to take the time to comment on each and every entry!
ReplyDeleteHang in there with this one! It's good! I wish they'd given me about five extra votes. ;o)
ReplyDeletethankyou so much for your words of encouragement, I'm wavering between hopeful and hopeless with this whole GUTGAA thing :)
ReplyDelete