Wednesday, June 6, 2012

The Universe is the limit!

Today is the day for airing the dirty writing laundry of our minds. Let it all out. We're all friends here. No one will laugh - that you can hear. We're all in this Insecure Writers Support Group together!

My annoying characteristic this month is my inability to say the right thing or just keep my mouth shut. That's why blogging is so good for me. I can read over what I type and proof read and edit before anyone reads it. You can't do that in person. My mind moves fast, my mouth can't keep up and judgment is bypassed to get my point across, usually interrupting someone and not sounding as good as I thought.

The art of conversation is necessary for going to conferences, pitching, meeting agents and editors, and being in a critique group or book club. I need to refine my art and listen more. Any suggestions? I'm all ears! Thanks!

And this week's Sensational Haiku Wednesday is Universal

Baseball has been full of highs and lows - I've been to most of the lows and am starting to wonder if I'm the jinx here! Inspired me to write this...

Universal Truth:
Parents relive childhood through
kids, knowing more now

It means more to us
Victories and losses are
A matter of pride

but I must end on a light note!

Remote of power
Controlling the universe
Choosing a channel

37 comments:

Madeline Mora-Summonte said...

I read somewhere that most people are busy trying to figure out what they're going to say next instead of actually listening to what the other person is saying and then responding. I'm working on this myself.

(Although, I tend to just keep my mouth shut most of the time anyway. I've gotten tired of people looking at me funny.) :)

Michelle Gregory said...

i think learning to listen is the best gift we can give ourselves and others.

Isis Rushdan said...

Being a talker is also valuable. It will help you start conversations at conferences where you need to network. However, once you've gotten the ball rolling, learning to pull back and take in what others have to say is where you will make a lasting connection. Practice with family and friends.

Chris Fries said...

Yes -- what Madeline said. Speaking effectively is 90% listening and 10% mouth-flapping.

Loved your haikus, too -- excellent work!

Tyrean Martinson said...

Great haikus - I have to admit I loved the last one best - it made me smile big!

As for the talking vs. listening thing . . .well, I wish I had good advice. Either I feel like I don't know what to say, or I want to jump up and down and interrupt. Listening is a really good skill . . .I think it takes lots of practice.

joanne said...

You made me wish I had children! Also, the 'remote' haiku was delightful....

anthonynorth said...

Enjoyed the haiku, and I think we could all do with an editor in the mouth at times :-)

Oregon Gifts of Comfort and Joy said...

Thank you for stopping by to say hi yesterday, Tara. I love your blog and am your newest follower,

Kathy M.

Kyra Lennon said...

I definitely share your "annoying characteristic" at the moment! It happens a lot when I'm tired lol!

Rena said...

Yeah, I too have the talking too much and interrupting. What I have found that helps is this:

I try to imagine that instead of talking to the people in front of me, I pretend they are my grandmother. She and I have exceptionally different political ideas, so if I don't carefully evaluate every word from her mouth, it could become a political free-for-all instead of christmas dinner.
When I listen to other people as carefully as I scrutinize my grandmother's words, I'm able to respond more intelligently and directly.

Hope that helps.

Mina Burrows said...

My only suggestion would be to hang out with people who get you, that way you'll never offend anyone. :)

You always write the best haikus too.

Dana said...

Love the remote haiku!

ArtMuseDog and Carol said...

Remote haiku is very 21st century ~ thanks, ^_^

I have been a 'listener' all my life and do wish people on the whole would really listen to each other ~ I need to 'talk a tad more' ~ LOL ~ enjoy the week ~ ^_^

M.J. Fifield said...

I too share that annoying characteristic. I keep my mouth shut for a good long while and then I just can't do it anymore. Disaster usually follows.

Love the haiku.

Cassie Mae said...

This is why I totally love online communication. Even though I hardly ever filter my blog posts, um... I'm a lot worse in person.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Madeline said it best!

Sheena-kay Graham said...

Love your haikus and I posted my first IWSG post. The remote haiku seemed a little dark to me. I'm not sure why. Never change Tara!

Christine Rains said...

I'm exactly like you. That's why usually I'm very quiet around people. My mind is going a mile a minute, but I clamp down on my tongue so I don't say silly things at the wrong time. And I have done it before, much to my embarrassment.

Annalisa Crawford said...

I used to be the same, until I got a job where listening is important. It's a case of practising - the more you converse, the easier it is.

Anonymous said...

Just about all of us do that. It's great that you want to improve in different areas. That's the sign of a very wise person.

Scribbles From Jenn said...

I have the same problem. Maybe I need to get a job with Annalisa. Or, just clamp down more on my tongue like Christine, and hope I don't bite it off. Of course, that would solve my speaking problems :/

Heather M. Gardner said...

I'm terrible at talking to people in person. I'm better off just listening before I screw something up.
Sorry I can't be more help.
Heather

Jemi Fraser said...

Even though I'm naturally pretty shy, when I'm nervous I babble constantly! I'm terrified if I ever go to a conference I won't stop talking either! :)

Kelley Lynn said...

Nice Haiku!!!

I tend to talk before I think sometimes... I'm working on it though :)

awalkinmyheart said...

The last one is aha! Love it.

The Lovely One said...

nice! My favorite is the first haiku.

JoLynne Lyon said...

No suggestions, it all happens to me, too. Well, I've got one. Don't give up. I'm told things improve with practice.

Julie said...

Love the haiku!

I'm so with you on this. My problem is I freeze up when talking in person and end up totally stumbling over my words or coming off like a complete moron. Writing is much easier!

McKenzie McCann said...

I know what you mean. This past week there have definitely been occasions I could have just killed my tongue.

It's funny. Everyone thinks writers are eloquent speakers, conversationalists, and essayists, but we all screw up at times.

M Pax said...

Lots of good advice. Practice I guess. Especially if you know people who are good at it. Observe, then try to mimic. My husband and several of my friends are very good at it. So, I pay attention when they speak now. One key is to listen. Another seems to ask questions of the other people ... so you seem interested.

Cherie Reich said...

I much prefer typing my answer than speaking. I get so tongue-tied on the phone and in person because I'm not sure what to say, and my mind often just draws a blank.

Nancy Thompson said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one with that problem. And when you find the answer to beating it, please, let me know, will ya? God knows I need to!

beccagivens said...

LOL ... enjoyed your set!! Thanks for sharing.
Universal Charm

kkkkaty said...

We share so many things..nice haiku..

Tara Tyler said...

Nice to hear so many understand this problem and can relate. Thanks for the support!

Madeline - how true it is!

Michelle - that's great advice!

Isis - excellent suggestion!

Rena - the problem is, most people are not as interesting as your grandmother! but i get it =)

Mina - that's why i blog!

Sheena - you came up with a book idea of an evil guy controlling the universe with a remote, didn't you!

JoLynne - yes, practice! i just have to remember at the time!

Mary - sometimes the people who are good at it, people want to listen to, like my hub!

And thanks for the sweets on the haiku =)

Nicki Elson said...

Oh mighty remote of power!

It's a cruel irony that writers have to step away from our comfortable spot behind the computer screen and into real life in order to get our written word read. I write soooo much better than I speak -- it's WHY I write! So, no sage advice to offer, but I'm here for ya in a 'misery loves company' kinda way. ;)

Donna B. McNicol said...

Better late than never (from IWSG).

Oh no, you mean I not only have to write my blurb but I have to speak it? Eeep!