Friday, December 31, 2010

Thursday, December 30, 2010

The Joy of the Family Hotel Experience

That's an oxymoronic statement.
It starts with, "This is a cool room!" "I love hotels!" "Can we go swimming?"

and moves on to, "Why does he get the remote?" "Mom, how does the shower work?"

and culminates in, "You're stealing all the covers." "Get out of the bathroom!" "I don't want to sleep with him!" "Can you please turn off the lights?"

finally, poking, the quiet game, giggles and threats of no video games for the next day unless they go to sleep...

Good times.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Results - Quick Prompt Contest Entry 12/28

Notta nuthin. I'm not surprised, I entered in the last ten minutes of the contest...ah well. Another time.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Quick Prompt Contest Entry 12/28/10

Another quick contest. I barely made it...
using words:

I sigh as I drop a page. I must stop fidgeting!

I stoop to pick up the trivial entity.
Embarrassment draws blood to my face like I stepped in a trap and got strung up by my toes. What are you staring at?!
Deep breath.

I peer at my competition. Are they aware of what is at stake?

I check the clock again.

Why do I chase these dreams of infamy? The outlook for me to win is bleak. I should go.

Was that my number?

I hop up. I breach the director’s office. Wish me luck.

Another page falls.

benefits of being sick

So somebody, namely my third child, had a stomach ache last weekend. We didn't think much of it. He was up and down, but the down wasn't for long...we even let him stay home from school. But he seemed fine. That was my mistake. I assumed it was something he ate or his sensitive stomach - nothing contagious that I needed to sanitize about.

So BLAMMO! I got it. And it was one of those nasty hits-adults-worse-than-kids kind of viruses. I was not a happy camper.

But it wasn't actually so bad after the initial hit. And having a sick day once in a while can have a few plusses...
  1. I was left alone - all day!
  2. I caught up on some movies
  3. I lost a few pounds!
  4. I was able to write in peace
  5. Someone catered to me for a little while
There might be more benefits, but those were my highlights. Unfortunately once I left my room, everyone assumed I was back to normal and quit helping. Back to reality. "Glad you're feeling better, Mom."

Thursday, December 23, 2010

just in time for xmas

I got an inspiration and spit out a short story - check it out, even though it's corny...=)


This is a new one, to me.
I was listening to my boys (11 and 7)  playing around down in the basement and they started joking/yelling at each other:
"Give me the <pause> ball!"
"No! Get your own <pause> ball! This is my <pause> ball!"
Then they would laugh.

They were censoring themselves! I was laughing and shocked!
How dare they! But it was funny. And smart that they thought of it.
I wonder if it will catch on...

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

fun with mirrors

Try looking in a mirror when you're in a state - mad, crying, stressed, etc

Seeing how you look when you're upset shows you what everyone else sees. "Wow, I look like that? That's ugly." or "Hey, I look good when I'm crying, my eyes are greener!" Either way, you change your expression.
It also takes your mind off your problem for at least a few minutes and when you think about it again, you have settled down some and can more readily deal with it.

I haven't tried this on my children, but I think I might. Although with them it would probably backfire.

i've been scrooged

This Christmas season has been exhausting.
The snow, sickness and stress have been relentless. I'm really tired of clorox, lysol and rubber gloves. I've washed way too many loads of sheets and towels - and the rest of the housework has been piling up.
And why does it seem that a million other things are added onto my to do list at this time of year besides presents and cards and decorating?
  • Someone or two in my house has been sick at least every other weekend - everyone but me and it's been making me paranoid to get sick.
  • We got our growing boys new furniture, shopped around, made arrangements for the old furniture, unpacked the drawers, delivery at different times so dealt with stress of partial rooms, finally restocked drawers and put everything back.
  • Our car lease is up next month so we had to go test drive - which we kept putting off because of all the sickness and travel.
  • We've had unexpected doctor, dentist and orthodontist appointments come up.
  • The kids have already had two snow days, which means I don't have to work, but I also can't get anything done - and it's only December!
  • My husband has been out of town a bunch - he never goes out of town in December. So I've been running ragged with practices and games. And whiners.

I'm not complaining. I'm venting. I'm dealing with it all. It's just exhausting. And I feel bad that I haven't kept up with all I need to. I didn't get some gifts I wanted to and now it's too late. And there's more that I probably won't get to. I finished putting together our last minute donation for the end of the year (which has to be on the porch by 7:30 AM) and was up late wrapping another round of presents tonight, so I figured I'd add my daily blurb... How bout that, it's 3 AM.

Things will slow down after the first, right? Wishful thinking.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Rudolph the Red Nosed Car

I love the silly people who dress their cars up like Rudolph for the Christmas season. They're spreading joy!


My cousin just had a baby! She and her husband have been trying for quite a while and

WHOOOP - There he is!


Saturday, December 18, 2010

babies are like puppies

If you don't have kids and are considering parenthood, get a puppy. It's like caring for a baby, at light speed. If you can do a puppy, it'll prepare you for the more important challenges of a baby. Some comparisons...
  • They both need constant attention
  • They sleep a lot in the beginning
  • Middle of the night wake up calls
  • It's ok to let them cry a bit before going to sleep
  • Don't let them get into the habit of sleeping with you - it's harder to break than to not start
  • They're so soft and cuddly - it's hard to get mad at them!
  • Bonus of a puppy, you skip over the diapers and go immediately to potty training. "Not on the floor!"
  • And they teethe without the crying, but you still have to yell, "Get that out of your mouth!"
Sleep, eat, play, cry, poop - isn't that what life is all about anyway?

Friday, December 17, 2010

Let me out

Substituting today inspired me to write this poem...
a christmas story snowfall graphic

Peaceful, floating,
      Quiet, white.

La la! Bla bla!
     Ha ha! Yikes!

Softness, blowing,
     Whisper, shhh.

Banging, stomping!
     Ouch! Crash!

Wishing out the window,
     Watching snow falling.

While inside the classroom,
     Students are sprawling,

Waiting for the bell to ring
     And Christmas break to begin!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

hide the pickle

It's not what you  think! Get your mind out of the gutter!
Unless you are thinking of the sweet little Christmas tradition that comes from Germany. I am of German descent and had no idea about it until one of my sons brought a paper pickle home with the story on it. It goes like this:

"The pickle is a German symbol of good luck. Traditionally German parents decorated the tree on Christmas Eve, hiding the pickle ornament last. On Christmas morning, the first child to locate the pickle was rewarded with a special gift from Kristkind."

At first, I was like, sure go ahead. It's funny because the boys really get into hiding this paper pickle that has stayed in tact for three years now. Once we get the tree up, they take turns hiding it. And they don't mess up the rest of the tree, amazingly. I don't do the gift thing, but now we have our own way of playing that makes us all happy. Until they fight over whose turn it is to hide the pickle first...

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

You can't fight it

I do not look forward to aging. I already have signs of body breakdown - graying hair, eyesight getting worse, can't lift as much... But as I always say, Whatever! Worrying about it will only make it come quicker.

Thinking about aging always reminds me of the circle of life. How we start as helpless babies, grow in knowledge and physical stature, then we reach our peak and start back down the slope, losing our strength and our minds, until we end up incoherent, dribbling and in diapers again...ain't life grand!

Baby, baby, goo goo
I wish I understood you.
Do you want a bottle?
Did you make a poo poo?

Oh my son you can't go
By yourself, you don't know
How to find your way home
Wait because I said so.

My young man is all grown
Out there in the unknown
Living life on his own.
I miss him and wish he'd phone.

Now I'm over the hill.
Can't afford a big spill.
Have to take another pill.
Memory has gone nil.

Hey, Mom, can you hear me?
Wonder if she can see
Does she know that we
always love her dearly.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Snow Day!

We had our first snow day this school year. It was very nice. We all had a good day. I even got some writing done. I thought about posting my first chapter for feedback, but I don't get much feedback so I think I'll hold off.

But I would like to write a short Christmas story. If you have any ideas, I'd love to hear them.

Stay well!

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Our God He is Alive

This statue was affectionately called "Touchdown Jesus." It was startlingly visible along I 75 North just south of Dayton, a symbol of the Solid Rock Church. According to their website, it looks like they start out with the scriptures, but they also like a "show" - speaking in tongues, divine healing, etc. Hence the  scary sculpture.

The six-story tall "King of King's" statue of Jesus Christ stands outside of Solid Rock Church in Monroe, Ohio.

It was recently struck by lightening. But never fear, the church is going to spend the half a million dollars to rebuild it. Think they could better use that money?
Flames shot up from the "King of King's" statue of Jesus Christ early Tuesday morning after it was struck by lightning.

Now we have this hideous distortion. If you have money, you can say anything you want, as big as you want.

I'm praying God strikes this with lightening too...if not, they'll know He is, soon enough.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

soothing sights and sounds

I found another study with pleasing results. It says the sounds of nature can reduce stress. Particularly tweeting birds, the patter of rain or a crackling fire. I guess that would include crashing waves and crickets? I think they sell CDs of that stuff to help people sleep?

But I like the advice from a Boston psychologist that said, "Concentrating is meditative." She advises stargazing because focusing and finding things through a telescope is soothing. I like sudoku, myself.

For more December healthy helpers, here is a link to the Prevention article.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Don't be afraid to ask and it shall be given

I know everything. Don't you?
And if I don't know, I like to figure it out for myself. I like to do it my way.
Does this sound familiar? No, I'm not a three year old!
But admitting we don't know something is a hard thing for most people to do.

I have grown out of that attitude, for the most part.
I still know a lot, but I know I don't know everything.
I still like to do it my way - and I think I know what's best for my family.
But as I get older, I realize others know stuff too.
And if I don't know something, I can ask and they'll help me.
It's amazing!
And there are advantages to asking for help.
It saves you time from figuring it out for yourself - use someone's else hard work, they earn their knowledge like we earn ours.
And it makes others feel good to share their knowledge and be helpful. I know I do.
You should try it.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Don't touch my stuff!

I've had a pretty good week. Even though I was busy for most of it, I got a ton accomplished and was in a pretty good mood, most of the time. Yeah, me!
But I have to share one incident that shows how insensitive people can be. Wednesday was my busiest day...
  • slept in until 6:50am (ha ha)
  • got child #1 and child #2 on bus
  • took shower, woke child #3
  • got child #3 on bus
  • dropped off HW for child #2 at school
  • picked up roast for dinner at grocery
  • put roast together into crock pot
  • met friend for brunch, relaxed a little =]
  • stopped in 2 stores for xmas gifts
  • home to complete grocery list and let dog out
  • got groceries in record time, incident occurred here
  • sped home to put groceries in fridge
  • dashed to pick up child #3 for unexpected orthodontist appt
  • then picked up child #1 to come with
  • ortho appt over early, time for snack at bookstore
  • picked up child #2 from after school activity
  • dinner & HW
  • cleared rooms and drawers to be ready for furniture delivery in morning
  • made last minute arrangements for bus next morning, husband had surprise am mtg come up
I think that was about it. Tuesday was almost as busy.
The incident: I am anal about my groceries. I hate when things get squished so I organize the stuff as I fill my cart and how I put it all on the belt to be bagged (I'd rather just do it myself and do sometimes). Elderly lady with only one item got behind me. She started "helping" me put stuff on the belt.
"Please don't help me," I said very nicely. Why don't you go do the self checkout or the express lane, I thought. But I kept smiling and unloading and was done in no time. I also don't like waste so I bring my own bags and don't bag anything large. I help the bagging person because they sometimes think all my stuff needs 2 carts - I have NEVER needed 2 carts (unless my husband comes along). Anyway I was hurrying so I could make it home and I felt like that lady was rushing me so I probably looked frantic and stressed (maybe I was).
She said, "You'll live longer if you take life less seriously." (How does she know how I take life?) and "Slow down and exercise." (HUH?) and "I ran marathons when I was younger." (SO??? This is my exercise!)
I just nodded and smiled. I said, "You have no idea what I have to get done."
She said "I had four children." (Yea? You probably sat home and baked cookies, too. I am not you!)
She didn't get why I didn't want her touching my stuff. First, she doesn't care about my stuff but more importantly I've been dealing with sickness in my house on and off for two months! DON'T TOUCH MY STUFF!!!

Whew. But I wasn't mad about it. I just think people should keep their judgements to themselves. Especially when they don't know the whole story.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

give a hand

Heard the expression "cold hands, warm heart?" Well apparently it should be followed by "warm hands, warmer heart."

"Prevention" noted two ways your hands can boost your mood...
1st - Holding hands and being affectionate with someone you love can reduce stress. How nice.
2nd - Holding a warm cup of cocoa or coffee can make a person feel warm and fuzzy.

That's a tough choice, isn't it?
just kidding.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Be Positive

Maybe if I write it down, it will help. Say it with me!

be positive, be positive, be postive...

Monday, December 6, 2010

wedding albums

If you are married (50% right?) - when is the last time you looked at your wedding album? Mine is in a box with several other wedding memories I can't remember.

So, this year forget the cookie parties, shopping parties and recipe exchanges.
I want to have a Wedding Album party! If you have some married friends invite the girls over for some refreshments and sharing. Every wedding has stories and if you're like me, most of the friends you have now, weren't around for your wedding. Even if they were, you can reminisce together.

I'd put up one of my wedding pictures, but that was before digital and I haven't scanned any yet...


December entry in long sentence contest.

Lamen was born in a baby pool, took his first steps across the street, received his first kiss from a dog, got fired from his first job due to his indifference, never married, never went to jail, never left his hometown and died without feeling a thing.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

how to avoid getting sick

One thing about the older generation, most of them cough into their hands. They were taught, "Cover your mouth when you cough" which was a good thing. But I had an elderly check out person the other day who was clearly under the weather. She kept coughing into her hand then grabbed my stuff to scan it. AAHH! I wanted to scream at her! But I just kept my mouth shut and left and lysoled everything when I got home. COUGH INTO YOUR ELBOW!!! It's a newer concept taught in schools these days, but apparently not everyone knows that they are spreading germs by coughing into their HAND!

More advice from a "Prevention" doctor was: during the cold and flu season try to avoid touching your facial orifices - eyes, nose and mouth. They are prime entry points to germs. I use the back of my hand or my wrist or anything other than my fingers when I have an itch and I haven't washed my hands in a while...even at my house. Those boys bring germs home daily!

Oh, yeah. And get lots of rest, eat healthier and exercise...

Saturday, December 4, 2010

tough love?

We went out to dinner tonight, as we do most weekends. At a nearby table there was a large group celebrating a birthday. There were 3 or 4 kids all under seven and they were pretty much running the table. But my favorite part of their spectacle was when one of the kids removed the string from a helium balloon. Aww, see what happens? It goes to the ceiling. But never fear, Dad will make a fool of himself, risking life and limb to get it. He stood up on the seat and held the child up over his head to get it while Mom took pictures. Yeah!

What's wrong with this picture? What have we learned here? That no matter what she does, Daddy will fix it for her. What if the kid had fallen? I couldn't watch.

I'm a mean mom. I would've let my kid cry a little and hope they learned not to do it again.

Then I looked at my own table and cursed the handheld games keeping my family occupied. Spoiled kids!

Friday, December 3, 2010

De-stressing advice

As I read my December "Prevention" magazine today, I came across yet another article about stress. I really like this magazine, but after a while the articles all sound pretty much the more healthy food, get more rest and exercise more. Those 3 things seem to be the cure for everything. And yet I can't bring myself to do it!

So here are new and improved ways to lessen stress:
1) sleep more - gosh, lookie there! If I didn't have so much to stress over, I would probably sleep more.

2) let it out! - Yell if you're angry, cry if you're sad and laugh if you're happy. Such and such study was done and said it was healthy to do so. I like this one. Being a Scorpio, I pretty much wear my emotions on my sleeve. Everyone knows how I feel most of the time.

3) hug your dog - or your cat or other huggable creature. If you don't have one, think about it - unconditional love.

4) don't share so much - this is more for those who go on and on about their problems. Basically it means: don't dwell on it, move on already!

5) chocolate is good! - of course it is, just don't overindulge. Have self-control. Where have I heard that before? Oh yeah. The BIBLE! (fruits of the spirit, Galatians 5:22-23)

6) find a way to escape - do you like yoga? jogging? reading? Take a break and do something you enjoy. Make time for yourself.

here is the link to the article .

PS - Later in the magazine it said to sing away stress - sing, sing a song, sing out loud...and don't worry if it's not good enough - belting out some carols will lift your spirits (a study said so)

Thursday, December 2, 2010

It's hard to be a Christian

I have a fiesty personality, especially when I'm late or if I've been wronged or when I have to take crap from nasty people. Those are the hardest times for me to have a Christian, turn the other cheek attitude.

And it seems that it all piles up and hits at once. But I guess it's not really a test if it's only one problem. It's gotta be one thing on top of another, pushing me to the limit. Well, I was tested tonight.

Problem #1, idiots on the road cutting me off and driving super slow because they didn't know where they were going - AHH! GET OUT OF MY WAY! Yelling at them inside my car is pointless and sets a terrible example to my kids.
Grade = "F"

Problem #2, son's opposing team is huge and playing down a level. So for our first game of the season we had to play Gulliver and his cronies. Two of our kids got hurt and I was responsible for both of them - AHH! THIS IS SO UNFAIR! WE SHOULDN'T BE PLAYING THESE GUYS! THIS IS RIDICULOUS! Tried very hard to keep mouth shut, complained some in stands with other mothers, happy to have boys to take care of to get mind off frustration.
Grade = "C"
(Final score 56 - 11 or something like that. And not only did they score a lot, but they were aggressively mean, no mercy, bullies - How can people like that coach be proud of their wins? Not just win at all costs - CRUSH THEM! And there is so much more, but I have to continue with my test...)

Problem #3, since we were late, house was a mess and it was pointed out to me when we got home. Fine, whatever, I cleaned it up while grumbling.
Grade = "A-"
(more to that story too, but not worth it)

Problem #4, Survivor. Two healthy young girls quit. There should be a penalty for quitting. They should at least let people that were voted off get another chance. One was just a wimp. The other was an obnoxious, selfish, defiant girl with way too much attitude - she is going to have a rough life if she doesn't find some humility or just some humanity. Good riddance, woulda been voted off anyway. Not really a test, just adds fuel to my "kids today are a bunch of lazy, spoiled whiners!"

Now I must attend to the dishes and get ready for work tomorrow. Maybe my evening will have a big finish and I'll get sick...hope not!

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

too big for our britches

Is there anything we can do about these kids?

Each generation thinks they know better than the previous one. Young people are losing respect for their elders more and more. I see too many parents let their kids walk all over them. They are on their cell phones or texting and their kids are running wild.

What happened to discipline? No one wants to be the bad guy and enforce rules. So many don't care what their kids are up to. They ignore the bad behavior.

Proper discipline promotes respect.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Wergle Flomp Poetry Contest Entry (Nov 2010)

The humorous poetry contest goes on thru April, so I won't know anything until after that. I posted the poem under "Short Stories +" if you're interested. It's called "Sarcastica." Feedback welcome!

I will also submit it to Cafe del Soul where my first poem was published online.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Results - Flash Fiction Contest Entry 11/15

The person judging the contest fell ill, but she finally got better and judged. Again I was honorably mentioned, but for "best soundtrack" - I need feedback on my writing! I'm probably still writing at a high school level, not very mature...oh well. I'll keep trying!

Sunday, November 28, 2010

where has all the conscience gone?

Does the wikileaks guy have a conscience? Does he think the leaking is for the greater good or does he even care? Does he care that he could be hurting or endangering people? Does he read what he puts out there? I wonder if he has a mother? What if someone close to him could be hurt by what he's doing? Would he care then?

And the government is stupid to add credibility to his leaks. If they denied what he was putting out there was true it might not receive as much press. Maybe less people would check it out. And if the info is ancient history, who cares?

When the other team figures out your game plan, it's time to change it anyway, right?

Don't cry about it. Deal with it. This site isn't going anywhere.

Saturday, November 27, 2010


Hope everyone had a pleasant Thanksgiving. Ours was a very nice visit. Good food and everyone got along.

While I was away, I saw "It's Complicated." I was looking forward to it. I like Meryl Streep and Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin, but I was disappointed. I hate it when Hollywood disses couples rekindling romances. There's plenty of love stories with people overcoming stuff to be together. But I don't like the movies with broken couples that hint at getting back together, then keep them apart. Movies like "The Breakup," "Mrs. Doubtfire" and "Stepmom." What's even sadder is that usually the kids (and the audience) are pulling for the parents to get back together. Then they don't and they tell the kids - there was a reason we broke up, etc. Well there was a reason they got together in the first place too.

Relating it to life - I want a happy ending for everybody! I wish people would stop giving up when the going gets rough. I'm glad I had such a good example of what it means to stick through the good times and the bad.

There is nothing positive that comes out of divorce. Period.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Black Friday

I've only gone out once on "Black Friday" and I never will again. Here's some encouragement to those brave enough to venture out on November 26.

Honk, honk!
Beep, beep!
I'm shoppin on no sleep!
Black Friday.

No you don't!
Yes I do!
No she didn't!
Boo hoo.
Black Friday.

Can't sit down
Must press on!
Walkin since before dawn!
Black Friday.

How'd you do?
I don't know.
Was it worth it?
I hope so!
Black Friday.

picture prompt entry

I like to enter writing contests. It helps me develop, I think. Last month this dumb picture came up as a prompt to write a story - I ignored it. Well, it either got a great response or a bad one because it came out again today asking for just an opening sentence. I like a good prompt, but this is just begging for a bad story. And after reading a few of the entries, I proved myself right. I had to add my own silly submission.

Curiosity got the better of Jane as she peeked in her daughter’s room and caught her in an awkward position with her fairy boyfriend.

(What a dumb picture!)

federal investigations

I read an article about a bust on Wall Street - a small insider trading network was exposed. The investigation is ongoing... (I like some of the comments at the end.)

WHATEVER! Only people with lots of money are investing right now. And if any little guys are still putting their life savings into a get rich quick deal - shame on them! The public should be saving! Anyone who has money to use should be extra cautious about it and choose a slow steady investment. We all know Wall Street is CROOKED!

The problem here is, this is a mote. Federal investigators need to remove the PLANK in the GOVERNMENT'S OWN EYE FIRST! Who is keeping tabs on Washington's irresponsible spending problem?

Monday, November 22, 2010

Dogs are great!

Scrap the scanners, forget the feel ups.
Do they not trust dogs? Do they think the public will be afraid of the dogs?
They should be! Maybe just having the dogs around would intimidate ne'er do wells.

I think dogs are a great solution!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

back to reality

I had a very nice birthday.

Today I had to take care of my husband and my youngest - both with yucky flu.

We'll see who makes it to Thanksgiving dinner...pray for us!

Hope everyone is well at your house.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Megamind Movie Review

Just saw "Megamind."
Loved it! Lots of twists and turns. Lots of funny lines and gags. Kid and adult humor.

My family gave it 4 out of 5 diamonds 
(the 5th is a party pooper)

Mama Bear

My sister-in-law emailed this to me and now I'm sending it to you...

In this life I'm a woman. In my next life, I'd like to come back as a bear. When you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that too.

When you're a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs. I could definitely deal with that.

If you're mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too. I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup, gonna be a bear!

Is there a down side?

Reducing the deficit

I watched two old guys (experienced and wise old guys) offer what I thought was a pretty good idea. Their committee was formed to try and reduce our massive deficit. I'm sure it's not as simple as it sounds. They presented that we should all pay a 16% or so income tax. No figuring out rules and tax laws, no crazy deductions. Just a straight % for all. Period. And they proposed cutting spending in every part of government. Again I say, sounds good.
The best part was, besides being simple and making sense, they worked on it with some young people. They said they liked working with the young people because other old people said it couldn't be done. The young people didn't think that way going in, they just said, "Let's do this!"

Here is the video.

So! Let's do this!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Nobody needs to see that

Been flying lately? Eww! I missed the full body scan this summer, thank goodness. And now the airport workers are getting cheap feel ups. Come on! Not only are these darn terrorists trying to steal our freedom - they're robbing us of our dignity!

I sent this note to the Transportation Security Administration. Couldn't hoit.

"I appreciate the lengths your organization is going to in keeping the public safe. I also know you're receiving many complaints about the invasive scans and body searches terrorists are making us resort to. I have to say I am avoiding air travel because of it.
My suggestion is to change to a better xray system. A complete, to the bone xray. I don't know the radiation ramifications, but I would rather walk through an xray machine than the two current alternatives. (Ever see Total Recall? Sci Fi here we are.) Thanks for your time!"

I'm sure they'll get right on it.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Flash Fiction Contest 2nd Entry 11/17

“Betrayal is such a harsh word,” I said.

“Hush! Just admit you stole the bear,” my light friend advised from my shoulder.

“Fine, if it’ll get you to stop bugging me. Now get! I gotta pee!”

“Wee!” she shouted. I flicked my conscience into the sky, but she never got upset. Maybe next time I should pluck her wings.

“Beware of the Were-Mer-Bear,” she warned before she disappeared.

Where? Mare? Bare? What the? Foolish, useless conscience.

Lost Connections

I've lost touch with many people I used to know.
I wonder about them. I found some on facebook a while back and it was fun seeing how people "turned out." (I had to quit because I got a virus from it)
There are still a few people I couldn't find.

It's sad that so many of us have to move around so much these days. We start to build relationships then have to move away. When I first had my kids we moved every couple of years. I wanted to lock myself in my house. I figured what's the point getting to know people when I'll be gone soon? Now, I've been here seven years (longest anywhere) and my closest friend had to move away.

It also makes me sad that not many people seem to be reaching out to find me. I guess I understand, being busy with our many activities, always something going on. But I thought I had close friends at the time.

Apparently distance makes you see who your truest friends are. The ones who bother to keep in touch.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Flash Fiction Contest Entry 11/15

Using the words: Betrayal, Sky, Wings, Light, Pee Wee and Bonus points if you can include this phrase: "Beware of the Were-Mer-Bear."

Here is my entry:
optional accompaniment, play tune #5:

The sun climbed slowly into the sky. The light cascaded onto her wings as she reached her lair above the lake and safely hid the treasure of her betrayal.

Pee Wee won’t miss his elfin talisman, Winona thought.

But Pee Wee felt its absence immediately. He woke and searched. He felt its compelling force from across the lake.

Must’ve been that mischievous flying centaur, he assumed.

He stomped off to fetch it. He paused at the lake to read the warning sign, “Beware of the Were-Mer-Bear.”

Pfah! No freak of nature is going to keep me from getting my…CHOMP!

It is what it is...

I am tired of hearing that phrase. It's popping up way too much.

It started out as a good way to say, "Accept what can't be changed."

Now it's taking on a more negative connotation, "Take it or leave it."
Shouldn't we be saying, "It is what it is, unless I decide to do something about it."

Complacency is not acceptance.

Sunday, November 14, 2010


Ever feel like you don't get enough accolades for all you do? Me too.
It seems like if we do what is expected of us and things are smooth, that's it. No awards of appreciation or "Way to Go!" unless something spectacular is accomplished.

But if we mess up - we sure here it then.

It's the same with God. If my life is going smoothly, I don't pay Him much attention. But if someone gets sick or something bad happens, the prayers are flowing.

I am going to try to equal that out. More thanks and less complaining...

Saturday, November 13, 2010


(single sentence story contest entry for November)

It wasn’t enough that she squashed him, took out his heart, ripped it into confetti and threw it all around while she danced on his remains, she had to make sure he was still breathing, that he hadn’t forgotten her, then lured him back to her lair, tricked him into loving her again, ate him alive and spat him back out.

People Worth Remembering #1

Let me tell you about the "Grandma Sub." Her name is Nancy Gabriel. I have no idea what her age is because she may look older on the outside, but inside she's a spry young chicken.

This amazing person epitomizes not only aging gracefully, but defiantly. Even the students see how special she is and remember her fondly (my oldest son included). She is full of energy, sharp as a burr and hilarious. She has a jampacked planner where she keeps her calendar of events (besides subbing, she sells Avon and she's president of her condo association!) and jots down inspirational quotes. When she was younger, she lived in Mexico City for a while. You'd never know she was fluent in Spanish by looking at her. ¡Increible!

I've only spent a couple of hours at different times with her but I was impressed and inspired by this awesome lady. She has such an extraordinary past and a continues to hold a positive zest for life. When I grow up I want to be just like her!

Friday, November 12, 2010

Cooperisms 2

I wasn't going to post this, but it's just too cute.

Everyone knows what number one and number two are, right?

My youngest likes to go number three.
(That's both at the same time.)

Thursday, November 11, 2010

The boycott worked

Amazon responded to my email and said the bad, bad book was no longer for sale. YEAH!

And I'm sure it's not just me, the author was on The Today Show so it received a bunch of negative press.
But that was fast!

Amazon is forgiven.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

I believe I may boycott

Amazon let a pedophile publish a "how to" book. I will not give the link.

They say they don't discriminate in the interest of free speech.

In the interest of not supporting illegal, disgusting filth and greediness, I will not be using for my xmas shopping this year and plan to tell them so.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Texting is dumbing us down...

Texting is great - for the quick, "WRU?" (where are you) or "TY" (thank you) or "PMURN!" (pick me up right now - yes, I made that up.) But, really, it's a good brief communication tool. It lets you pause, send a message (pls p/u dinner) and keep moving. And you don't have to respond right away - unlike the phone where you have to keep talking until the conversation is over, what a drag. (ha ha)

I see three major texting abuse problems on the rise (besides the obvious illegalities of sexting and TWD - texting while driving):
1) LIVE COMMUNICATION SKILLS ARE AT RISK - Young people are not learning how to communicate face to face (or speak on the phone). They even text each other standing side by side! Some pre teens I know think they have boyfriends or girlfriends but their whole relationship, from "r u my gf?" to "im brkng up w/u" is all via text (which isn't necessarily a bad thing at that age - safe distance). They won't figure out how to overcome their shyness this way. Face the awkwardness!

2) ENGLISH IS NOW HISTORY - Texting is finding the shortest way to say something, inventive abbreviation. Letter writing lessons are becoming obsolete, punctuation is for making creative faces, and spelling? there's an app for that...

3) ONE MORE LINK TO "RISKY BEHAVIOR" - I just read an article that discussed results from a teen survey linking "hyper texting" (120 + texts/day) with "risky behaviors" - sex, drugs and alcohol. Apparently the same parents who are not monitoring or setting limits on texting aren't monitoring or setting limits in the other parts of their lives. Makes sense to me. PARENTS NEED TO BE THE BAD GUYS! It's only temporary and they need boundaries! Your relationship will be awesome when they grow up if you do it right. Deal with it!

There is such a thing as too much of a good thing.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Junk mail pile up

I hate waste. This is the worst time of year for it too. So much junk mail. Today my youngest got the mail for me and he kept dropping all the magazines and flyers on his way from the mailbox.

But it isn't just in the obvious forms. The stuff I really hate is the sneaky stuff. The extra ads, coupons and offers in my bills. Even attached to the stinking envelope! And the extra receipts. Please take our survey online for a coupon. My paper recycling piles up so fast!

If anyone really cared about saving trees, they would start with a ban on junk mail of all kinds.

I should help too by banking online. I guess I'm just not ready to let go of the physical bills and checks. It just seems too easy for people to mess with my bank account, or make mistakes, transpose a couple of numbers and poof, no money! It's happened to me a couple of times, only with small amounts, thank goodness. But leaving it all up to computers is just too scary. Some day. But not today.

Sunday, November 7, 2010


Email is great.

I have been unleashed on the public recently - a couple of dinners and meeting new parents. I don't get out much, besides subbing, so my adult interaction is a little rusty. This means that I have a lot to say that's been bottled up and it doesn't always come out right. So if I have ever offended anyone with my sarcastic, untamed wit, please excuse me. I don't mean any harm...

This is why I really like email (and now blogging). I can proofread my words before I send them. This isn't foolproof either, but it's much better than blurting out "That's hilarious!" when it wasn't meant to be a joke...did I mention my hearing is going, too?

Texting is a whole other story - I dont abbreviate 2 much 4 fear of misunderstanding, I get that enough as it is.

Friday, November 5, 2010

I'm proud of my husband

Well, he is actually smarter than I usually give him credit for. He loves sports and is a great manager. He knows how to deal with the public. And he is a detailed organizer. All these qualities make him an awesome coach and leader in our local sports organizations. He just showed me how he revamped our community baseball league's website. It's pretty darn good and I wanted to tout about it:

Thursday, November 4, 2010

I'm sick of cancer!

I know too many people that have had, survived, died from or are dealing with cancer! I always thought it would get me some day too. But I hate it!

The only prevention is: Eat better (more colorful produce, less junk), exercise more (or at all) and go to the doctor. But my favorite is laugh more! (seriously!)

Please do this, especially if it runs in your family. I will too! HA HA J

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Football Fanatic

Well, it was great to get that rant about football out of my system a couple of weeks ago. We haven't had to worry about the point spread rules lately, so it's been more fun watching the games. Here is a link to the highlights for the week:

My son is in it twice, pulling flags off "Browns" left and right. Only two games left in the season.

Then on to basketball...

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Buying a politician

I want to know where all the money comes from that supports candidates. Millions and billions of dollars!!! Fundraising, lobbying, big businesses and organizations. Does anyone else see a problem here? Why does it take so much money to get elected?

1. I assume most is for advertising and travel. SOLUTION: most of that could be saved by using the internet, facebook, etc. That is still "free" for now.

2. I also have a bad feeling that a lot of money goes to digging up dirt on the opponents and damage control when their own secrets come out. SOLUTION: put all your dirty laundry out there: "Here is the website of all the bad things I've done. Everyone makes mistakes. I've learned from mine and I'm not afraid to tell you about it." Honesty would be refreshing! ULTIMATE SOLUTION: Be a good person to begin with!

3. This money could do much more good elsewhere! Like pay down our incredible debt! Invest in our country and let the people vote for themselves.

4. Finally, if big corporations and organizations are paying for candidates - who do you think they have to report to? It's not the little people. I want a candidate who says "no" to big contributions. I would vote for them! Then they report to us!

Now go vote, if you haven't yet! And as my mother says, "Pick the lesser of the two evils!"

Saturday, October 30, 2010


Did you hear about the bomb packages sent from Yemen to US and England and India via UPS? UPS!!!Miserable, zealot terrorists!

Now we have to be paranoid of the mail. We have to be alert for any suspicious activity that used to be considered normal. Even the government wants average citizens to call in. I don't envy them sifting through the crazies to find the real threats.

Who is allowed to feel safe? Well, if we can assume their targets are major cities, maybe the suburbs are safe? For now. If you remember "War Games" I always agreed with that crazy scientist that I wanted to live away from major cities because if a war broke out, they'd be the first to go...Is Cincinnati a major city? Maybe we need to move West...Then there was an invention in another movie I like, "Total Recall," that had a mass walkthru x-ray machine - I like that better than the full body scan and the lines would move quicker! What's a little radiation, right?

It's a horrible shame what evil can do in the name of their "religion." We keep backpedaling to prevent what already happened then they find new ways to do more! So frustrating! They're like cockroaches - so hard to get rid of!

I say again - "Watch and Pray!"

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Super Mom

Hey all you super moms out there! We have many titles, maid, chauffer, cook, nurse, psychiatrist (ha ha), etc. I just added one to my list:

I'm a junior orthodontist! My youngest got spacers put in last week for braces and of course he fooled with them until one came out. I wasn't about to clear my schedule, miss another day of work and hike all the way back over there just to put that thing back in (especially since I was bringing him back in a few days for the braces)!

It even took me a few days to get around to calling them. She said if we could floss without a snag he was fine (he'd only worn it a few hours, so I knew that wasn't going to happen). After inspecting the little spacer and trying to put it back in myself with no luck, I realized it was just a tiny rubber band. I stuck a similar width rubber band between his teeth and cut it down - worked like a charm and no questions asked when we went in. Yeah me!

Keeping in touch

In today's society many folks have to move around for their jobs and lose touch with friends. At one point I was moving around so often I didn't want to leave my house or meet anyone because I knew I wouldn't be there for long.

Facebook was so great when it first came out. I looked up all my old friends. It was satisfying to see how people turned out and pictures of their kids. She looks great, I never would've thought she'd get divorced, I can't believe he survived cancer! he's the same age as me!

Then it got weird. Some people talked about their daily activities - I'm brushing my teeth now. Wow, I think I need a new toothbrush. - Hey, I think you missed a spot...Totally unnecessary. And I also had people trying to be friends with me that I had no clue who they were. That was a little creepy. My husband didn't like that.

So after I caught up with everyone I could remember, I quit. I sometimes think about going back to it. I'm trying to promote myself so when I get published (and I will!) people will buy my book(s). I give my card (for my blog) to people I know in hopes of more feedback. I'm hesitant to advertise too much for fear of the vultures and poachers that are out there to take advantage of my infant status. I'll let you know when I jump back in - for some reason I think people feel more comfortable commenting on facebook too.

I guess the people I know are like me - hesitant to put their info out there - or I'd have more fans. I know you're reading it, at least. Thanks! You can always become an anonymous fan =)

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

boys vs girls

I think my mom had it lucky only raising two sweet, helpful, obedient girls (right, Mom?)

I love my rambunctious, loud, teasing boys, but I can't stand their aim. I hate their bathroom. And they are starting to smell. And I hear it gets worse! Oh, my cute little babies, where have you gone? Come here and clean that toilet yourself!

But I must've been meant to just have boys because a girl wouldn't be able to take my mean mom side. It would have been nice to have an understanding woman later on though.

It takes both kinds...

Monday, October 25, 2010

Mickey D's

Please don't raise the price of the dollar menu!

Why is the government so concerned with what we eat?
I know, I know. The poor eat at McDonald's on a regular basis so they're getting fatter and have no insurance so the rates go up when they have to go to the ER from all the fatty food, right? (There are so many things wrong with that)

It could also be that there's too much technology gluing people's butts to their seats and they aren't getting enough exercise. Are they going to start taxing us if we don't measure up? I'd like to trim some executive fat, myself...

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Results - 10/19 Quick Prompt contest

I got an honorable mention for my 2nd Entry as "Best 'Hick' Voice"
Yeah, me!

The Land of the Mediocre

My youngest is playing flag football - it's so fun to watch. But it can be frustrating because it's supposed to be a learning experience. They have to let everyone play equal time, all the positions, etc.

That's ok. We've won a couple games and by wide margins. So wide that the league manager made a new rule that teams would forfeit their games if they win by too much (33 pts). So fine. We can hold back. There's no need to pummel anyone. I hate when coaches show no mercy.

Well, last week those darn kids kept scoring and we got just within the limit. The league manager (a spry 30 yrs old?) happened to be there and entered our huddle. He told our kids not to pull the flags. They looked at him like he was nuts. The silly boys pulled the flags anyway.

So this week, the guy sent out another new rule. If your team is up by 20 points, the other team gets to keep the ball until they score. And he added  "Solution=Let them score!!!" Now I think it's getting ridiculous.

These accommodations are really bugging me. I chatted with a grandpa from our team and he was more steamed about it than I was. He linked it to the future of our once great nation. Which is going down the toilet since we all have to hold hands and carry each other instead of letting the dead weight fall and letting the cream rise to the top! (IE - Why should they work if we're just going to give it to them!)

Making kids feel good about their mediocrity is not helping. They're taking the fight out of kids and turning them into a bunch of sissies. I have not sent my reply and don't know if I will. Unfortunately there are rerpercussions when people speak up against "the man." Plus I might hurt his wittle feelings. Here it is:

Is mediocre the goal for this league?
I am all for not running all over other teams and keeping a score spread limit, out of respect - no one likes to see another team get crushed. (I have older sons who have been on losing teams and it's tough, but they can take it - it's part of life!)
I'd like to know your objective in teaching the kids to "Let them score!!"
"Don't pull the flags, Johnny"      "Why not, Coach?"
"To be nice"                              "Are they going to pull our flags?"
How is this fair? Do you think the other team is going to feel better if we patronize them by letting them score? Why don't we just give them the 6 points? How far are you planning to go here?
And are you just making up rules as you go along? Everyone is not created equal no matter how you try to force them to be.
football mom

"When everyone is super, no one will be." Syndrome (The Incredibles)

Saturday, October 23, 2010


I just found a fun website that has a contest for writers to submit one sentence. Just a sentence about anything at all. Reading some of the previous winners, they get quite lengthy. The limit is 50-60 words. Talk about a run-on. Since the contest is continuous throughout the year, I decided I would enter once a month, because it's fun. Here is my first entry:

He swore that never again would he gaze upon that face, that gnarly, wretched, scrunched up, wicked, loathsome, vexing, car-crash-rubber-necking, pasty, pale, petrifying, mirror-breaking, hexifying face.

If I ever win anything, don't worry, I will pass it on.

Friday, October 22, 2010


I'm sick today. Got a penicillin shot for strep throat that I caught from my darling son.

Before being diagnosed I went to work, I had an obligation, I made it through the day.

The best thing about the mom being sick - getting peace and quiet. The others have to fend for themselves. It's nice (besides the discomfort) to relax, catch up on reading and sleep, and not worry about chores for a day or so.

Thursday, October 21, 2010


I have to pass this on. It is mediation advice from a certain Buddhist, referred to as "the happiest man in the world." (taken from Prevention magazine, Sept 2010)

Start with 10 minutes and work up to 20 daily. (words in parentheses are my comments =)
1) find a balanced position - crosslegged on the floor or in a chair (before or after you make dinner, do homework, dishes, etc ?)
2) breathe calmly and naturally, concentrating on the air going in and out of your nostrils (nostrils, hee hee)
3) when you are aware of your breathing, (this is my favorite part) imagine an innocent, joyous young child approaching - in your mind, look at him with tenderness and feel unconditional benevolence and love (aahh ha ha haha! They are the reason I need to meditate!!!)
4) let yourself be absorbed by this love that wishes only for his well-being (this guy must not have children...that's why he's so happy!) and nourish the feeling for a few minutes (hurry before someone gets hurt or they come and jump on you or tattle on someone)
5) bask in the mindful awareness of love (hearts and flowers, etc)

My advice from the land of reality
1) make spouse or other responsible party watch kids for 10-20 min, shoot for at least once a week, daily would be impossible
2) lock yourself in a bathroom or closet
3) then take a bath or read or sit and do the yoga/meditating stuff, something you like to do

When you come out, you will be ready to love them again!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Where does it all go?

I can get confused by many things. TV is confusing to me. Ever think about it? Bits of information sent by wires, fiber optics or waves! to our tvs that unscramble them and put the pieces back together so we can watch. And all in the blink of an eye. Amazing.

And the internet. So much information available for us to view or add to. Where is it kept? And with so many people adding more and more info all the time - will it get full? Could the internet overload?

Things that make me go, Hmmm.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

2nd Entry

Same contest, take 2. This entry is diametrically opposed to the first entry. I think I like it better...

Two good ole boys crouched by the swamp under the crescent moon. The ribbitting revelry was raucous.

“Do you think we’ll see it?” asked Abe.

“Definitely. It’s that time o’ the month. You know, hormones. And there’s too many toads. It’s a re-gu-lar smorguss-board!” answered Jeb.

“Curse it all! I forgot my bi-noc-u-lars!”

“Shh! It’s comin!”

Out of a misty cloud came the soaring harpy. Diving fast, claws outstretched, aiming for a big, fat, juicy toad.


All that was left was a splat of blood.

“Whooeee! That was amazin! What’s it called agin?”

“A Krokolian Rage.”

“More like Croak-olee-an.”

Quick Prompt Contest Entry

Given 5 words: moon, hormones, claws, blood, curse, and bonus phrase: Krokolian Rage; an agent challenges her blog readers to come up with a 100 word or less story. Prize is a new vampire book (oh, yeah! sarcastic). But I'd take it! I just like getting the practice. Here was my entry.

The name Jayla Krokus triggers genus flora. But the peaceful image dies in the flash you spy her short, spiked, raven hair shooting up from a pale, moon pie face. You shiver coldness and death as she opens her vacant, black eyes to reveal the curse of a soulless creature apathetic to your pain. Her claws rip your flesh and she drinks your blood to fulfill her own survival instincts. Panting, her hormones finally subside as the Krokolian Rage is soothed. For now.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Needs Improvement

I think I've been a bad example this weekend. Overly critical, less patient, more bossy, etc.

I wish I could apologize to all those that I may have offended, but it's impossible (many were at the overcrowded amusement park we went to...hence my inability to control my attitude).

I will just have to work on handling stress better. And keeping my mouth shut - it doesn't always come out right...ah, well. It's a new week.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

It's great to be 7!

Happy Birthday to my little guy!

May he always keep his chin up.
May he laugh more than he cries.
I love to watch him when he plays
Because I know he always tries
his best.

Seven's a great age to be.
Innocent and wondrous and
fearless and full of energy.
And still willing to lend a hand
to me.

Don't baby me or coddle,
don't embarrass me.
But kiss me when I fall off
my bike and skin my knee.
I love you.

Thursday, October 14, 2010


Cute show? A few years ago it could have been. Now is really bad timing. Who wants to watch a show that is glamorizing other countries doing our work for us? Not to mention the lead American guy is an idiot.

We need jobs, but no one wants to answer phones? Why not? Are we too proud? Or are companies too cheap? (that could be it!) Well, it's not ok!

I'd rather watch an Indian family dealing with daily life in America than a jab at how companies outsource work.

The whole situation is a joke.

Gossip Gone Wild!

Ever get a forwarded email from someone you know that's been forwarded several times...?
"Read this, it's so funny" or cute or whatever.

Unfortunately, some things that are sent around the internet are false or distorted information. I've been watching the news and many people are being misquoted and have to stand up for themselves on tv to tell everyone - "No, I didn't say that" or "That was taken out of context"

And I just watched O'Reilly talk about a far-left website that put a smear/boycott commercial on tv against Target. Apparently Target made a donation to a business friendly organization (not party oriented) who in turn gave monetary support to a conservative politician. So the liberals and gays heard what they wanted to hear and demonstrated at some Targets. For shame!

Too many people jump on a band wagon before they have all the facts - and there are devious minds who love to take advantage of them.

Please be careful! It's like thinking before you speak, but worse. Research before you send!
(And go to Target!)

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

The Lazy Housewife - prologue

I've been writing this book for 3 years...I've been too lazy to try to get it published yet. I'm working on research from the public (interviewing friends, like you!) Here is the prologue.

Do you ever feel like Cinderella? This could be the story Cinderella was based on…

The dog yelps for his breakfast at 6am – no need for that alarm clock. Better get up before he wakes the little princes. Let dog out, feed him. He is so happy – wish I had that energy but have to trudge back upstairs for shower or not.

Sweetly nudge princes #1 and #2 who grumble. Have to raise voice and sometimes threaten. Finally get them moving and take breakfast orders. Back downstairs to mister wiggle-butt happy-pants (that's the dog, not the husband). Make breakfasts, get boys on bus. Wake prince #3 who is usually more pleasant. Once he gets on the bus, then the fun begins.

The kitchen is always a disaster after the whirlwind of breakfast and packing lunches. Clean, wipe, rinse, repeat. Run the dishwasher. Pay some bills. Plan day. Is it grocery day? Target? Book fair? Class party? Or just a clean house day? Don’t forget to purge the kids’ clothes and toys for the donation coming up. And then there’s the laundry. Balance the checkbook. Make a dr’s appointment. Make sure something gets vacuumed or scrubbed. Not to mention taking the dog out in between chores. And all of a sudden it’s 3pm.

Kids get home. Have snack. Tease each other. Time out. They play, you start dinner. They complain. After dinner they either do homework and complain some more or go to practice. Come home, finish homework, showers, bed. WHEW!

9ish Cinderella gets to watch her recorded tv show before crashing. “What? Not go to the ball? What did you say?” (in high pitched, mousy voice)

My dream come true is “House” and my pillow.

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